he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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