Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
