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it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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