and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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