BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero