I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.