i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
