woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
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A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
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I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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