the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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