I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
this will be a night to untag.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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