We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
