Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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