the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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