Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
