I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
