I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I think your dad took our porno
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
