Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
