Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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