Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
My vagina is officially offended.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
