So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
