I wanna bring you to show and tell
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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