It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
wow bdsm is so cute
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