Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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