We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
