There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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