i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
