Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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