I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
