I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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