OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
