Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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