I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
