he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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