Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
