You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
