she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
