I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Randomize
