You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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