Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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