fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize