I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
