The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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