I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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