I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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