Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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