well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
kristin has been a bad kristin
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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