Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
