College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
