My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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