That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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