There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
