What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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