no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
