it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
being pregnant is like rehab
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize