Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
